Finding my way through the maze of life...

Wednesday, January 26, 2011

Attitude

I have recently discovered the TED website (ted.com). What an amazing and inspirational site! I listened to a talk called “The 3 A’s of Awesome”. The gist of it is about a man whose life had been going pretty well but then ran into a string of bad luck, not just bad luck, but terrible things started happening; his wife left him, his friend died. He was inundated with these terrible things and had a choice: suffocate under the awfulness that was closing in on him or find a way through. He decided to start a website that focused on 1000 things to be happy about and eventually started to emerge from the funk of life’s down cycle. As he was doing this, he came up with the 3 A’s of awesome: Attitude, Awareness and Authenticity. 
I don’t want to go any further with the explanation; I think you should go to the site and watch it. He’s an excellent speaker, very inspirational. The reason I brought this up is because it helped give me a glimpse of how much I’ve let myself become bogged down by worry and fear lately. It’s so easy to forget about what makes me happy! I’ve been really worried about my family, work, money, health, etc. that I am forgetting about all the stuff that’s going right lately.
I also listened to a very compelling talk called “Using Our Practical Wisdom”. Wow, this one is great! It’s about the need for common sense and the ability to let people do the right thing for each situation they are presented with, without restricting their ability to think for themselves. It also discusses the consequence of stifling our ability to think for ourselves. Awesome stuff! (I could do an entire post on just this topic, but not today).
Being the crazy list maker that I can be, I’ve decided to make a list of what makes me happy every day to help me remember that these are the things I am living for and these are the things that are truly important:
-          Waking up next to my husband. I like having him there.
-          Seeing my son smile in the morning.
-          Hearing my son talk about the world around him.  This morning he asked for a yogurt cup for breakfast and he looks at the cup and asks “Where baby go?” There’s usually a pic of a baby on the package, but today there was only a pic of a banana.  It was so cute! He then says to me “Mommy, baby fall down and hit head.” This would explain why there was no pic. Thank you to the “Little Monkeys” song that taught him that when you fall down, you hit your head.
-          Spending time with my girlfriends. They always make me laugh and think and stop taking myself too seriously!
-          Eating. I love eating!
-          Sleeping. First runner-up after eating.
-          Calendars.  I like having a mini-calendar in my purse, a wall calendar at my desk, one in my kitchen AND I use the one on my cell to remind me of stuff. Overkill? Maybe.
-          Chocolate. Godiva chocolate squares with caramel. Mmmmm.
-          My iPod touch. Games, music, silly stuff.
-          Notebooks.  I write stuff down all the time, yet I’m very forgetful.
I could go on, but that would be too self-indulgent and I don’t want to bore you. What I’m hoping to do is remind myself that for every one thing that brings me down, there’s something that picks me up. I’m not Atlas, I don’t need to carry everything around and be a drag. It’s time to lighten the load. I’m going to think about ways to do this more. I used to TiVo stand-up comedy on Comedy Central; that was fun, it could get a little annoying at times though, I tend to like intelligent comedy and shy away from fat-jokes. It’s time to find something new… The key here is to start with my attitude.
Attitude is the first step with anything.  Why is it so easy to have a bad attitude? Part of me thinks it’s because it’s easier to shun things than it is to participate. Participation requires responsibility and effort. Those things can be work and, you know what they say, nothing worth doing is easy – but who wants more work? It all comes back to attitude. How you approach each situation in your life can determine how much effort is required. When I look at my day as a chore, the effort it takes to get through it is already doubled before the day has even begun. When I look at my day ahead as something fun or take it one part at a time, the day doesn’t seem so daunting. My trouble is being consistent in my attitude and thinking.
Here are my questions for my new blog buddies: What do you do to take yourself less seriously? How do you lighten up? How do you maintain a positive attitude?

Monday, January 24, 2011

Happy Monday

A lot of heavy stuff has been on my mind lately, not the nicest way to start a blog! I’m feeling more refreshed this week, maybe it’s the new Grapefruit scented body lotion I started using? They say that citrus is an invigorating scent. It must be working!  Granted, I didn’t jump out of bed or anything, but how could you when it’s 7° out?! Even my child was irritated when I went in to get him ready for school, and he’s usually all smiles. (Note to self, teach child to speak better to find out how he always wakes up in a good mood). Poor thing didn’t want to change out of his pjs! I’m all for seasons, but I hate extreme weather. Thankfully, January is almost over and February is a short month!
Like every other red-blooded American, I am trying to figure out ways to save money. One thing I have been working on is couponing. It’s not difficult, just time consuming. I put it to use this weekend and got some great results – full groceries under $100! I even bought the huge pack of diapers. Pretty amazing! I just have to get the meal planning aspect down and I think it will be much better. And then….there’s baby on the way….not sure how he/she will impact the grocery bill yet.  I have some time to figure that out…
Before I forget, I am also still trying to figure out how to structure a day at home without work. I had this idea about writing down all the activities I want to do that are impossible because I work.  Then, as I think about this I remember if I am not working, some of the stuff won’t happen because I won’t have the extra income, but I won’t let that distract me!! Here’s a list of a few things I would like to do:
-          Go to the museum
-          Visit the playground with the kids
-          Go to the library for story times/clubs
-          Go to the gym
-          Grocery shop on a Tuesday morning (I have this idea that no one will be there on Tuesday mornings)
-          Join a mommy-group
-          Ride my bike more
-          Shop
-          Cook more often
I envision this idyllic June Cleaver-like existence without the skirt, heels and pearls, where my house is spotless and everyone is smiling. I know the reality is not like that. I hate to clean; I am still trying to figure out how to get that done with my 2 year old awake. I’m naturally prone to avoiding overly strenuous situations, for example, any errand that requires me to get my kid in and out of the car seat more than 2x is out. The fight isn’t worth it. Plus, most of my ideas center on warm weather, so a lot of that is out in the winter months. Ugh, I could use some ideas! Anyone want to chime in? I’m all ears (eyes).

Thursday, January 20, 2011

Day 2, slow going

I guess this blog thing takes a bit of time. I'm a bit sad that no one commented on my post, but I am new here so people probably don't know about it yet. 

I spoke with a friend about my post and she felt it was good, but a little harsh. I was surprised to hear that, since I didn't even curse once in it! I know my thoughts won't always be accepted by others, but the point of the blog is to have a place to share my ideas with minimal censorship and get feedback from others on how they are getting through life. I'm fairly certain that I'm not the only one wondering how to get stuff done while holding down a full time job and full time family. I am almost positive that I am not the only one that wonders if the grass truly is greener on the other side...

One of the other things I have been thinking about lately is how to structure a day without work. After housework and making sure the kids are fed and cleaned, what do people do to fill their day? With a newborn, it's pretty straight forward, but with a toddler, it's harder. They need a lot more stimulation and activities to fill the day. How did our parents do this? I'm trying to remember what I did as a child and I remember playing on my own a lot. My siblings were older and I entertained myself. My mom didn't do as much playing with me as I feel I do with my child. But, I can't really rely on my memory for that sort of stuff. 

I feel like some people just have a gift for raising children. The whole maternal thing just come naturally to them and for those of us that aren't so instinctual, that's frustrating. So, that's my question for the universe: What does a day in a stay at home mom's life look like? 

Wednesday, January 19, 2011

One world...

Why do we think we are part of the world if we are working? Why don’t we feel part of the world as stay at home parents? Perhaps it’s because the title says Stay At Home, which is the opposite of Out in the World. Maybe the title needs to be revised? I’ve heard of Domestic Engineer, that’s ok for the nerds and Stay At Home Dads. A friend of mine calls herself the CEO of her house, which is cute til you realize the paycheck stinks. I know, I know, mothers should be content with the love of their families and sloppy baby kisses as sustenance. (Whatever. I love my family and the messy kisses I get from my child, but that doesn’t pay the mortgage or get us into a much needed larger home.)
What’s funny to me is people that are supposedly part of the world, AKA Working, still feel detached from life and the happenings of the world outside their cube. What a wicked world we live in; no matter where we are in it, we never, truly feel part of it.  Perhaps this is why I started this blog.  I want to know if my thoughts are shared by others. 
What are other people doing to stay connected to their world? I have been working my whole adult life and now I am a working mother. I want to know what people feel the pros and cons of their world are.  The grass is always greener, they say, but I am skeptical.  I’m more in the camp of sticking with the devil I know.  There are days when I feel staying at home with my kids is the right thing, but I worry about staying connected to the world and keeping them engaged.  I’m pretty addicted to my paycheck as well as my retirement contributions and the thought of losing that and years of experience scares me. 
Related Posts Plugin for WordPress, Blogger...