Since April, a lot has happened. I was pregnant, had a baby, quit my job and have been trying to figure out my way ever since. I agonized over staying home and, at first, it wasn't easy, but now I'm glad I am doing this. The lack of paycheck kinda sucks and the temptation to fall into the pit of my own world is strong at times, but I keep trucking.
One thing that I learned, again, is that it's hard to make friends as an adult. I've been delving into the crazy world of mommy groups. I've met some nice people, but it takes time and isn't easy to connect when the kids are trying to rip toys out of each-others hands. Ah, motherhood. One thing that is great about the mommy groups is that when your child is being a cave-person, they aren't looking at you like you've lost all control. Most of the time the moms all understand and are really nice about the tantrum your child is throwing. Then, the storm passes and it's on to the next child's tantrum.
I wish I knew how other moms kept up with their house cleaning. I feel like the house is a constant dirt pit with clutter everywhere. I'm dreading Christmas because it just means more crap to add to the crap that's already there! It was a challenge getting the house clean with one kid, it feels impossible with 2! One friend told me that I should invite people over more often, that way I will be forced to clean, but I truly prefer to sleep instead. I can't help it, that's the truth.
Well, that's what's on my mind today. Not sure if anyone will see this since I haven't written in a LONG time, but it's out in the Inter-Web now and maybe someone will be kind enough to judge me.
TTFN.
Friday, December 16, 2011
Tuesday, April 5, 2011
Last Night's Dinner Preparations
I got home later than usual last night, so my wonderful husband picked up our son from daycare and fed him dinner and then proceeded to make us a marvelous frozen pizza for him and I to eat. I was VERY grateful!
As we continued on with our normal week night routine of cleaning up, playing and bedtime, I realized I was just too tired to do anything else and resolved to sit on the couch and watch DWTS. This plan would've worked if it weren't for my husband deciding to be productive and get some chores done while I lazed on the couch. Sitting there, watching Tom Bergeron extoll about the rigors and trials of celebrity dancing, trying to ignore the food needing to be prepared in the fridge and the basket of laundry waiting to be folded, I caved. Well, I put up a fight first, I tried to flip through the new Everyday with Rachel Ray magazine that arrived that day, but they changed the format and it wasn't just a leisurely flip-though! It urked me so much. Now, I caved.
I got up and opened the fridge. There were a few ideas swimming in my mind, but the most pressing was the realization that I will not have time tomorrow (today) to make a full meal. I had all the fixins for a stir fry and a hearty chicken soup. I opted for the stir fry just because it is faster!
Here's the recipe, I hope you guys like it.
As we continued on with our normal week night routine of cleaning up, playing and bedtime, I realized I was just too tired to do anything else and resolved to sit on the couch and watch DWTS. This plan would've worked if it weren't for my husband deciding to be productive and get some chores done while I lazed on the couch. Sitting there, watching Tom Bergeron extoll about the rigors and trials of celebrity dancing, trying to ignore the food needing to be prepared in the fridge and the basket of laundry waiting to be folded, I caved. Well, I put up a fight first, I tried to flip through the new Everyday with Rachel Ray magazine that arrived that day, but they changed the format and it wasn't just a leisurely flip-though! It urked me so much. Now, I caved.
I got up and opened the fridge. There were a few ideas swimming in my mind, but the most pressing was the realization that I will not have time tomorrow (today) to make a full meal. I had all the fixins for a stir fry and a hearty chicken soup. I opted for the stir fry just because it is faster!
Here's the recipe, I hope you guys like it.
Easy Pork Stir-Fry
1 lb boneless center cut pork chops sliced thin length-wise
1 yellow pepper sliced thin
1 medium yellow onion sliced thin
1 – 8 oz. pkg. sliced white mushrooms
1 bunch asparagus trimmed then cut in half
1 bunch scallions, chopped
1 Tbsp. grated ginger (I buy a tube and squirt it into the pot)
4 Tbsp. vegetable oil
1 tsp. Five Spice powder
¼ c. soy sauce
Heat wok or large pan with 2 Tbs. oil, add pork and Five spice powder, ½ the soy sauce – stir often. Let brown on both sides, about 3 or 4 minutes. Remove from pan, set aside and cover. Add last 2 Tbs. of oil to pan/wok, heat a minute, then add onions and peppers. Let cook til slightly soft, stirring often on high heat. Return pork to pan. Next, add asparagus, rest of the soy sauce, and ginger. Cook til the asparagus is bright green, stirring often. Now, add mushrooms, cook til slightly soft, stirring often. Turn off heat, add scallions and stir. Serves 4.
This can go over a bed of spinach or brown rice. Enjoy!
Wednesday, March 30, 2011
Rotini with a Creamy Mushroom Sauce
One of the things I love to do is cook. I don't get a lot of time to do it, so I try to find really quick things to feed the family that are wholesome. I wanted to share this recipe because it came out so great! If you try it, let me know what you think. Sorry there's no pics, but I'm new at this.
Ingredients:
1 box of Rotini (I use Whole Wheat Barilla, but you can use any brand and shape you want)
1 - 8 oz. pkg. of sliced mushrooms (I used baby bellas)
1/4 of an onion, finely diced
2 Tbsp butter
1 c. white wine (something cheap, since you're cooking with it and not drinking it! Or you could use chicken broth)
2/3 c. heavy cream
1 tsp. thyme
Salt and pepper to taste
1 c. parm. cheese
Directions:
Cook pasta according to box directions, drain.
While pasta is cooking, melt the butter in a medium size frying pan on medium heat. Once melted, sautee the diced onion for 2 mins. til soft but not brown. Next, put in the sliced mushrooms and cook for a minute, stirring it around a couple of times. Set heat to low and cover the mushrooms for 3 or 4 mins. until they become soft. Once soft, uncover and add salt, pepper and thyme, stir together. Once combined, add in the wine and reduce to about half. Next add the heavy cream stirring everything together thoroughly. Now, raise the heat to medium-high. Bring sauce up to a simmer and let it simmer til the sauce thickens about 5 - 8 mins.
Once the pasta is ready, pour sauce with mushrooms over it and then add the cheese. Stir thoroughly. Enjoy!
Ingredients:
1 box of Rotini (I use Whole Wheat Barilla, but you can use any brand and shape you want)
1 - 8 oz. pkg. of sliced mushrooms (I used baby bellas)
1/4 of an onion, finely diced
2 Tbsp butter
1 c. white wine (something cheap, since you're cooking with it and not drinking it! Or you could use chicken broth)
2/3 c. heavy cream
1 tsp. thyme
Salt and pepper to taste
1 c. parm. cheese
Directions:
Cook pasta according to box directions, drain.
While pasta is cooking, melt the butter in a medium size frying pan on medium heat. Once melted, sautee the diced onion for 2 mins. til soft but not brown. Next, put in the sliced mushrooms and cook for a minute, stirring it around a couple of times. Set heat to low and cover the mushrooms for 3 or 4 mins. until they become soft. Once soft, uncover and add salt, pepper and thyme, stir together. Once combined, add in the wine and reduce to about half. Next add the heavy cream stirring everything together thoroughly. Now, raise the heat to medium-high. Bring sauce up to a simmer and let it simmer til the sauce thickens about 5 - 8 mins.
Once the pasta is ready, pour sauce with mushrooms over it and then add the cheese. Stir thoroughly. Enjoy!
Places I am dreaming about...
The weather just doesn't want to let go of winter...It looks nice, but it's cold and tiresome. I wish I were here...
Or here...
It would be fun to take my kid out to play! This would be a fun place...
Can you spot the theme here? :)
Or here...
It would be fun to take my kid out to play! This would be a fun place...
Can you spot the theme here? :)
Monday, March 21, 2011
Embrace Your Crazy, Chaotic Life
That's the name of this article from CNN.com, I liked it so much I want to share...
http://www.cnn.com/2011/LIVING/03/21/o.embrace.crazy.chaotic.life/index.html?hpt=Sbin
http://www.cnn.com/2011/LIVING/03/21/o.embrace.crazy.chaotic.life/index.html?hpt=Sbin
Monday, March 14, 2011
The Devil
I’ve often heard that the devil isn’t out in the open. It isn’t obviously and conspicuously wearing a red suit with a pitchfork as an accessory. The devil’s sly and cunning, preying on our inner-most fears and insecurities. The devil needles its way into our personal thoughts creating shadows and doubt in things we normally look at with confidence. It disguises itself as well-meaning advice that we feel we can never live up to and turns our attention from finding viable solutions to beating ourselves up over how terrible we must be because we can’t follow that great advice. It always makes perfect sense and never loses it’s cool. It just waits for the perfect moment to drop the bomb in the most understated way, so as not to cause any serious alarm, just enough to make you feel completely uneasy. You are left with the nagging sensation that you aren’t doing enough or that the decision you made wasn’t right or the feeling of wanting to run and hide because you aren’t sure of anything anymore.
This devil has a name, it’s called Guilt. It’s VERY happy to make your acquaintance. Guilt starts small; I should really clean out the sink before bed…I shouldn’t have let the kids eat all those cookie.
Then it grows; I should have more patience and be able to stop my baby from crying for hours…If I loved them more, the kids would be happier.
Then it gets out of control; If I plan everything, nothing will ever go wrong…I’m a terrible mother for wanting an afternoon to myself…I’m a terrible mother because I wish I could leave the house whenever I hear my baby cry…
We all know Guilt. This devil could be the mom you are comparing yourself to at a mommy group or your mother/mother-in-law making you second guess yourself or all those experts telling us we are doing it wrong. Sometimes it isn’t anyone or anything giving us guilt but ourselves. We expect more of ourselves based on some idea we came up with in the past. We are trying to live up to some ideal and feel we are falling short. The thing is we can change our minds.
POOF! ALACAZAM!! PRESTO!!!
Change your mind.
The only person keeping score is you. I’m too busy keeping my own score and I’m a terrible conductor, the whole orchestra is out of tune!
Wednesday, March 9, 2011
Disco Lemonade
When I remember Marcy Playground's song 'Sex and Candy' it reminds me of how cool I thought it was to go to fraternity parties in college, as long as you don't look too closely at the Disco Lemonade! I miss alcohol. It will be so nice to have a glass of wine after the baby's born.
I have been pretty busy the past week and half. I really wanted to put up a new post last Friday and then the night got away from me; not because I felt that people were clamouring to read it, especially after the reaction I got from the last one, but because I just like doing this.
I started parking in the maternity spot at work. I kept getting lectures from people saying that I could slip and fall in the parking lot and I should get the pass that allows me to park there (mind you, I could slip and fall in the building, but whatever). What I found out shortly thereafter was that there's a dozen pregnant women at my job right now all competing for the 2 maternity spots! I work in a pretty large building, lots of people come and go, you can't expect that 2 maternity spots would be sufficient. I look at them as a nice gesture, but really, I could use the exercise because I don't need to get to work any earlier just to get one of those spots.
It's starting to get uncomfortable to sit all day at a desk and since it wouldn't look good for me to go roaming around the building all the time, I decided to try working standing up and set up a make-shift platform to raise my laptop off the desk. It worked ok, til I realized that I then needed something for my mouse. I just can't work on the tiny mouse pad on laptops. I'm in the process of stacking all the books in my cube to get to the proper height for my arm. Needless to say, it looks pretty ghetto, which is probably why the dept. assistant sent over someone from facilities to look at my desk and scrutinize what I was doing. I guess I will find out soon enough if there's an issue with my set up. There are lots of companies that have work stations designed to adjust higher or lower so you don't have to sit all day. I wish I worked at those places! I saw someone sitting on one of those exercise-ball chairs and asked where she ordered it from. I was told that the company doesn't provide that sort of thing and that she bought it on her own. That's fine I guess, but if my company is trying to promote health and wellness (which it is) you would think it would be more open to something like that. But, promoting the topic costs them nothing and saves them millions in health benefits. Do you ever feel like you went into the wrong line of work?
I have been pretty busy the past week and half. I really wanted to put up a new post last Friday and then the night got away from me; not because I felt that people were clamouring to read it, especially after the reaction I got from the last one, but because I just like doing this.
I started parking in the maternity spot at work. I kept getting lectures from people saying that I could slip and fall in the parking lot and I should get the pass that allows me to park there (mind you, I could slip and fall in the building, but whatever). What I found out shortly thereafter was that there's a dozen pregnant women at my job right now all competing for the 2 maternity spots! I work in a pretty large building, lots of people come and go, you can't expect that 2 maternity spots would be sufficient. I look at them as a nice gesture, but really, I could use the exercise because I don't need to get to work any earlier just to get one of those spots.
It's starting to get uncomfortable to sit all day at a desk and since it wouldn't look good for me to go roaming around the building all the time, I decided to try working standing up and set up a make-shift platform to raise my laptop off the desk. It worked ok, til I realized that I then needed something for my mouse. I just can't work on the tiny mouse pad on laptops. I'm in the process of stacking all the books in my cube to get to the proper height for my arm. Needless to say, it looks pretty ghetto, which is probably why the dept. assistant sent over someone from facilities to look at my desk and scrutinize what I was doing. I guess I will find out soon enough if there's an issue with my set up. There are lots of companies that have work stations designed to adjust higher or lower so you don't have to sit all day. I wish I worked at those places! I saw someone sitting on one of those exercise-ball chairs and asked where she ordered it from. I was told that the company doesn't provide that sort of thing and that she bought it on her own. That's fine I guess, but if my company is trying to promote health and wellness (which it is) you would think it would be more open to something like that. But, promoting the topic costs them nothing and saves them millions in health benefits. Do you ever feel like you went into the wrong line of work?
Friday, February 11, 2011
Patience Practice
I've been really trying to work on the issues I've shared so far and feel like, slowly, things are getting brighter. Part of me feels like it's because I've created a place to share my thoughts and part of me thinks it's because, in writing about the things that concern me, I am making them more concrete and tangible. For me, having something that's too abstract is scary and makes me feel like I need to run away. Creating the illusion that these concerns are like rocks to chip away at, I feel as though I can see my progress as I chip, chip, chip.
For instance, patience. I've really been working on this with my son and those around me and I can see some positive results. I have noticed that when he goes from zero to meltdown over something seemingly small, I have been able to squat down to his level, ask him if he can calm down in a soothing tone and get him to try to explain what he wants. 9 times out of 10, this has worked! He seems to appreciate that mommy is trying to understand and listen to him and create a solution. The only time this doesn't work is when he's completely maxed out and tired, once he gets to this state nothing but his bed will make anything better. It's been a real relief and I find myself feeling more in control of our attitudes. Everyone (son and husband) seem to be responding well to it.
There are some great by-products with this patience practice! I feel like I am much more reasonable and I'm not just reacting to situations. At daycare my son and another child seem to always be at odds and I've been getting pretty upset about it. From my perspective, it seems like the other little boy, we'll call him Timmy, is kind of a bully. On Monday, I walked in to pick up my son and found him on the ground crying because Timmy had shoved him. On Tuesday, my son was walking towards the door with a cup of cookies in his hand when Timmy ran over and whacked it to the floor. Now, this was only this week, but we have had numerous other incidents with Timmy. It upset me and I started thinking that this needs to end. I don't like that Timmy is so aggressive and mostly toward my son. This makes trying to teach my son that hitting, kicking, biting, etc. is wrong so much harder! I went to the assistant director of the school before we left on Thursday and told her my concerns, she was very receptive. So, I went home and started discussing it with my husband and suggested the possibility of moving him to a different toddler room.
My husband, God bless him, is very even tempered and likes to look at all angles before making a decision. Admittedly, I wasn't thrilled when he wasn't 100%, all for my idea right from the start. He suggested that we shouldn't over-react. Now my alarm bells start ringing: WARNING! WARNING! What is he saying? How can he suggest I am over-reacting??? Especially when this is something that has been going on for months! Well, had I been a little more reasonable at that moment, I would have realized that he wasn't saying I was over-reacting, but that we should avoid it if we can. This realization didn't come til the next day. OF course, in the moment I acted defensively, but I buttoned my lip and kept listening. The rest of the night I processed what he said and felt that he had some valid points. He suggested finding out more about the kids relationship - are they really best-buds and stuff happens because they are always together? Or are they trying to stay away from eachother but can't seem to stop butting heads? I left my conversation with him feeling a little frustrated, but I didn't argue with him, I tried to listen better and I promised I wouldn't do or change anything til I found out more.
THIS IS HUGE FOR ME!! Although at that moment I truly felt I was right and what I wanted was the only solution, I mustered the patience to cool off and think it through.
Everyday I call the daycare to check on my son, today is no different. When the assistant director answered I asked her if she had told the director about our talk and what they thought. She told me that it was an easy fix and if we wanted, we could switch rooms as early as next week. Now, instead of saying GREAT! Let's do it! I proceeded to ask her to find out more, per my husbands suggestion. She was happy to accomodate.
When I went to pick up my son today, I found out some interesting things. He and Timmy like to play together; sometimes my son gets excited and that manifests physically and Timmy then reacts in kind. Sometimes Timmy acts in unpredictable ways toward my son, which makes him nervous, and he reacts in kind. Sometimes it's Timmy, my son and another little boy that like to rough-house a bit and it's not malicious, it's just them being boys. Boys will be boys, but sometimes they get hurt. Ok, I am just going to spit it out....Myhusbandwasright.....BLEH.
I've never wanted to be the kind of person that blindly believes that her child is flawless, but I really thought he was a victim. I'm glad I didn't jump to any rash decisions and found out more. None of the boys are being bad, they are just learning to behave around eachother, and that's not bad. We have decided to wait and see how things progress, I would hate to take away my sons friend because I couldn't be patient enough to listen to what's really going on. I'm really grateful that my husband and our daycare were so open to listening and suggesting solutions. I'm also grateful that my husband didn't dismiss my concerns and chalk it up to pregnancy hormones! That would've pissed me off.
I have a long road ahead of me and I know I'm going to slip up, but I can see the light. It's brighter and I like it.
For instance, patience. I've really been working on this with my son and those around me and I can see some positive results. I have noticed that when he goes from zero to meltdown over something seemingly small, I have been able to squat down to his level, ask him if he can calm down in a soothing tone and get him to try to explain what he wants. 9 times out of 10, this has worked! He seems to appreciate that mommy is trying to understand and listen to him and create a solution. The only time this doesn't work is when he's completely maxed out and tired, once he gets to this state nothing but his bed will make anything better. It's been a real relief and I find myself feeling more in control of our attitudes. Everyone (son and husband) seem to be responding well to it.
There are some great by-products with this patience practice! I feel like I am much more reasonable and I'm not just reacting to situations. At daycare my son and another child seem to always be at odds and I've been getting pretty upset about it. From my perspective, it seems like the other little boy, we'll call him Timmy, is kind of a bully. On Monday, I walked in to pick up my son and found him on the ground crying because Timmy had shoved him. On Tuesday, my son was walking towards the door with a cup of cookies in his hand when Timmy ran over and whacked it to the floor. Now, this was only this week, but we have had numerous other incidents with Timmy. It upset me and I started thinking that this needs to end. I don't like that Timmy is so aggressive and mostly toward my son. This makes trying to teach my son that hitting, kicking, biting, etc. is wrong so much harder! I went to the assistant director of the school before we left on Thursday and told her my concerns, she was very receptive. So, I went home and started discussing it with my husband and suggested the possibility of moving him to a different toddler room.
My husband, God bless him, is very even tempered and likes to look at all angles before making a decision. Admittedly, I wasn't thrilled when he wasn't 100%, all for my idea right from the start. He suggested that we shouldn't over-react. Now my alarm bells start ringing: WARNING! WARNING! What is he saying? How can he suggest I am over-reacting??? Especially when this is something that has been going on for months! Well, had I been a little more reasonable at that moment, I would have realized that he wasn't saying I was over-reacting, but that we should avoid it if we can. This realization didn't come til the next day. OF course, in the moment I acted defensively, but I buttoned my lip and kept listening. The rest of the night I processed what he said and felt that he had some valid points. He suggested finding out more about the kids relationship - are they really best-buds and stuff happens because they are always together? Or are they trying to stay away from eachother but can't seem to stop butting heads? I left my conversation with him feeling a little frustrated, but I didn't argue with him, I tried to listen better and I promised I wouldn't do or change anything til I found out more.
THIS IS HUGE FOR ME!! Although at that moment I truly felt I was right and what I wanted was the only solution, I mustered the patience to cool off and think it through.
Everyday I call the daycare to check on my son, today is no different. When the assistant director answered I asked her if she had told the director about our talk and what they thought. She told me that it was an easy fix and if we wanted, we could switch rooms as early as next week. Now, instead of saying GREAT! Let's do it! I proceeded to ask her to find out more, per my husbands suggestion. She was happy to accomodate.
When I went to pick up my son today, I found out some interesting things. He and Timmy like to play together; sometimes my son gets excited and that manifests physically and Timmy then reacts in kind. Sometimes Timmy acts in unpredictable ways toward my son, which makes him nervous, and he reacts in kind. Sometimes it's Timmy, my son and another little boy that like to rough-house a bit and it's not malicious, it's just them being boys. Boys will be boys, but sometimes they get hurt. Ok, I am just going to spit it out....Myhusbandwasright.....BLEH.
I've never wanted to be the kind of person that blindly believes that her child is flawless, but I really thought he was a victim. I'm glad I didn't jump to any rash decisions and found out more. None of the boys are being bad, they are just learning to behave around eachother, and that's not bad. We have decided to wait and see how things progress, I would hate to take away my sons friend because I couldn't be patient enough to listen to what's really going on. I'm really grateful that my husband and our daycare were so open to listening and suggesting solutions. I'm also grateful that my husband didn't dismiss my concerns and chalk it up to pregnancy hormones! That would've pissed me off.
I have a long road ahead of me and I know I'm going to slip up, but I can see the light. It's brighter and I like it.
Thursday, February 3, 2011
Patience
Did you ever wonder what the hell Axle Rose knew about Patience? He's one to talk, huh? I see it around me all day long, people demanding from others immediately but then demanding patience when the demand is put on them. The worst of it is me, I keep trying to teach my child patience, but have none with him.
Sit down, now!
Stop that, now!
Get down, now!
These are things I say over and over and over. All. Day. Long. I forget frequently that the kid is only 2 and his impulse control is non-existant. But, mine has had quite a few years of training; you would think it would be perfect by now. HA! Hardly. How did I get this way? More importantly, how do I stop?
I thought to myself, I should start meditating. Then realized, I hardly have time to shower and do my hair, how am I gonna medidate? Peace, quiet and stillness are 3 things that are rarely ever together in my home. Even now, the baby is in bed, but I hear the THUD THUD THUD of the treadmill as my better half works out. No TV, no radio, no other noise except THUD THUD THUD. This is as quiet as it gets, I consider myself lucky.
Back to patience, it's elusive to me. I'm not bad with it in public, although I do get irritated at the supermarket when there are only 2 lanes open on a Saturday morning, only one being full service, and 15 people with full carts waiting to check out. Really? Is that how you want to start a weekend? There are plenty of people standing around that can check us out. UGH! See? This is what I mean, I can't help myself! Even as I type, I am irritated and impatient with the Supermarket. AND THAT WAS 5 DAYS AGO!! This vicious cycle has got to stop. Then this carries over in my dealings with my family.
I read somewhere that there's a woman that makes her New Year's resolutions on the first of every month. This way she doesn't lose sight of the things she wants to accomplish. Maybe I should try this? I know it's the 3rd of February, but maybe if I pick one thing this month to work on, it won't be so daunting.
RESOLUTION FOR THE MONTH OF FEBRUARY:
Exercise more patience with my loved ones. Especially with my child. Get creative!
Sit down, now!
Stop that, now!
Get down, now!
These are things I say over and over and over. All. Day. Long. I forget frequently that the kid is only 2 and his impulse control is non-existant. But, mine has had quite a few years of training; you would think it would be perfect by now. HA! Hardly. How did I get this way? More importantly, how do I stop?
I thought to myself, I should start meditating. Then realized, I hardly have time to shower and do my hair, how am I gonna medidate? Peace, quiet and stillness are 3 things that are rarely ever together in my home. Even now, the baby is in bed, but I hear the THUD THUD THUD of the treadmill as my better half works out. No TV, no radio, no other noise except THUD THUD THUD. This is as quiet as it gets, I consider myself lucky.
Back to patience, it's elusive to me. I'm not bad with it in public, although I do get irritated at the supermarket when there are only 2 lanes open on a Saturday morning, only one being full service, and 15 people with full carts waiting to check out. Really? Is that how you want to start a weekend? There are plenty of people standing around that can check us out. UGH! See? This is what I mean, I can't help myself! Even as I type, I am irritated and impatient with the Supermarket. AND THAT WAS 5 DAYS AGO!! This vicious cycle has got to stop. Then this carries over in my dealings with my family.
I read somewhere that there's a woman that makes her New Year's resolutions on the first of every month. This way she doesn't lose sight of the things she wants to accomplish. Maybe I should try this? I know it's the 3rd of February, but maybe if I pick one thing this month to work on, it won't be so daunting.
RESOLUTION FOR THE MONTH OF FEBRUARY:
Exercise more patience with my loved ones. Especially with my child. Get creative!
Wednesday, January 26, 2011
Attitude
I have recently discovered the TED website (ted.com). What an amazing and inspirational site! I listened to a talk called “The 3 A’s of Awesome”. The gist of it is about a man whose life had been going pretty well but then ran into a string of bad luck, not just bad luck, but terrible things started happening; his wife left him, his friend died. He was inundated with these terrible things and had a choice: suffocate under the awfulness that was closing in on him or find a way through. He decided to start a website that focused on 1000 things to be happy about and eventually started to emerge from the funk of life’s down cycle. As he was doing this, he came up with the 3 A’s of awesome: Attitude, Awareness and Authenticity.
I don’t want to go any further with the explanation; I think you should go to the site and watch it. He’s an excellent speaker, very inspirational. The reason I brought this up is because it helped give me a glimpse of how much I’ve let myself become bogged down by worry and fear lately. It’s so easy to forget about what makes me happy! I’ve been really worried about my family, work, money, health, etc. that I am forgetting about all the stuff that’s going right lately.
I also listened to a very compelling talk called “Using Our Practical Wisdom”. Wow, this one is great! It’s about the need for common sense and the ability to let people do the right thing for each situation they are presented with, without restricting their ability to think for themselves. It also discusses the consequence of stifling our ability to think for ourselves. Awesome stuff! (I could do an entire post on just this topic, but not today).
Being the crazy list maker that I can be, I’ve decided to make a list of what makes me happy every day to help me remember that these are the things I am living for and these are the things that are truly important:
- Waking up next to my husband. I like having him there.
- Seeing my son smile in the morning.
- Hearing my son talk about the world around him. This morning he asked for a yogurt cup for breakfast and he looks at the cup and asks “Where baby go?” There’s usually a pic of a baby on the package, but today there was only a pic of a banana. It was so cute! He then says to me “Mommy, baby fall down and hit head.” This would explain why there was no pic. Thank you to the “Little Monkeys” song that taught him that when you fall down, you hit your head.
- Spending time with my girlfriends. They always make me laugh and think and stop taking myself too seriously!
- Eating. I love eating!
- Sleeping. First runner-up after eating.
- Calendars. I like having a mini-calendar in my purse, a wall calendar at my desk, one in my kitchen AND I use the one on my cell to remind me of stuff. Overkill? Maybe.
- Chocolate. Godiva chocolate squares with caramel. Mmmmm.
- My iPod touch. Games, music, silly stuff.
- Notebooks. I write stuff down all the time, yet I’m very forgetful.
I could go on, but that would be too self-indulgent and I don’t want to bore you. What I’m hoping to do is remind myself that for every one thing that brings me down, there’s something that picks me up. I’m not Atlas, I don’t need to carry everything around and be a drag. It’s time to lighten the load. I’m going to think about ways to do this more. I used to TiVo stand-up comedy on Comedy Central; that was fun, it could get a little annoying at times though, I tend to like intelligent comedy and shy away from fat-jokes. It’s time to find something new… The key here is to start with my attitude.
Attitude is the first step with anything. Why is it so easy to have a bad attitude? Part of me thinks it’s because it’s easier to shun things than it is to participate. Participation requires responsibility and effort. Those things can be work and, you know what they say, nothing worth doing is easy – but who wants more work? It all comes back to attitude. How you approach each situation in your life can determine how much effort is required. When I look at my day as a chore, the effort it takes to get through it is already doubled before the day has even begun. When I look at my day ahead as something fun or take it one part at a time, the day doesn’t seem so daunting. My trouble is being consistent in my attitude and thinking.
Here are my questions for my new blog buddies: What do you do to take yourself less seriously? How do you lighten up? How do you maintain a positive attitude?
Monday, January 24, 2011
Happy Monday
A lot of heavy stuff has been on my mind lately, not the nicest way to start a blog! I’m feeling more refreshed this week, maybe it’s the new Grapefruit scented body lotion I started using? They say that citrus is an invigorating scent. It must be working! Granted, I didn’t jump out of bed or anything, but how could you when it’s 7° out?! Even my child was irritated when I went in to get him ready for school, and he’s usually all smiles. (Note to self, teach child to speak better to find out how he always wakes up in a good mood). Poor thing didn’t want to change out of his pjs! I’m all for seasons, but I hate extreme weather. Thankfully, January is almost over and February is a short month!
Like every other red-blooded American, I am trying to figure out ways to save money. One thing I have been working on is couponing. It’s not difficult, just time consuming. I put it to use this weekend and got some great results – full groceries under $100! I even bought the huge pack of diapers. Pretty amazing! I just have to get the meal planning aspect down and I think it will be much better. And then….there’s baby on the way….not sure how he/she will impact the grocery bill yet. I have some time to figure that out…
Before I forget, I am also still trying to figure out how to structure a day at home without work. I had this idea about writing down all the activities I want to do that are impossible because I work. Then, as I think about this I remember if I am not working, some of the stuff won’t happen because I won’t have the extra income, but I won’t let that distract me!! Here’s a list of a few things I would like to do:
- Go to the museum
- Visit the playground with the kids
- Go to the library for story times/clubs
- Go to the gym
- Grocery shop on a Tuesday morning (I have this idea that no one will be there on Tuesday mornings)
- Join a mommy-group
- Ride my bike more
- Shop
- Cook more often
I envision this idyllic June Cleaver-like existence without the skirt, heels and pearls, where my house is spotless and everyone is smiling. I know the reality is not like that. I hate to clean; I am still trying to figure out how to get that done with my 2 year old awake. I’m naturally prone to avoiding overly strenuous situations, for example, any errand that requires me to get my kid in and out of the car seat more than 2x is out. The fight isn’t worth it. Plus, most of my ideas center on warm weather, so a lot of that is out in the winter months. Ugh, I could use some ideas! Anyone want to chime in? I’m all ears (eyes).
Thursday, January 20, 2011
Day 2, slow going
I guess this blog thing takes a bit of time. I'm a bit sad that no one commented on my post, but I am new here so people probably don't know about it yet.
I spoke with a friend about my post and she felt it was good, but a little harsh. I was surprised to hear that, since I didn't even curse once in it! I know my thoughts won't always be accepted by others, but the point of the blog is to have a place to share my ideas with minimal censorship and get feedback from others on how they are getting through life. I'm fairly certain that I'm not the only one wondering how to get stuff done while holding down a full time job and full time family. I am almost positive that I am not the only one that wonders if the grass truly is greener on the other side...
One of the other things I have been thinking about lately is how to structure a day without work. After housework and making sure the kids are fed and cleaned, what do people do to fill their day? With a newborn, it's pretty straight forward, but with a toddler, it's harder. They need a lot more stimulation and activities to fill the day. How did our parents do this? I'm trying to remember what I did as a child and I remember playing on my own a lot. My siblings were older and I entertained myself. My mom didn't do as much playing with me as I feel I do with my child. But, I can't really rely on my memory for that sort of stuff.
I feel like some people just have a gift for raising children. The whole maternal thing just come naturally to them and for those of us that aren't so instinctual, that's frustrating. So, that's my question for the universe: What does a day in a stay at home mom's life look like?
I spoke with a friend about my post and she felt it was good, but a little harsh. I was surprised to hear that, since I didn't even curse once in it! I know my thoughts won't always be accepted by others, but the point of the blog is to have a place to share my ideas with minimal censorship and get feedback from others on how they are getting through life. I'm fairly certain that I'm not the only one wondering how to get stuff done while holding down a full time job and full time family. I am almost positive that I am not the only one that wonders if the grass truly is greener on the other side...
One of the other things I have been thinking about lately is how to structure a day without work. After housework and making sure the kids are fed and cleaned, what do people do to fill their day? With a newborn, it's pretty straight forward, but with a toddler, it's harder. They need a lot more stimulation and activities to fill the day. How did our parents do this? I'm trying to remember what I did as a child and I remember playing on my own a lot. My siblings were older and I entertained myself. My mom didn't do as much playing with me as I feel I do with my child. But, I can't really rely on my memory for that sort of stuff.
I feel like some people just have a gift for raising children. The whole maternal thing just come naturally to them and for those of us that aren't so instinctual, that's frustrating. So, that's my question for the universe: What does a day in a stay at home mom's life look like?
Wednesday, January 19, 2011
One world...
Why do we think we are part of the world if we are working? Why don’t we feel part of the world as stay at home parents? Perhaps it’s because the title says Stay At Home, which is the opposite of Out in the World. Maybe the title needs to be revised? I’ve heard of Domestic Engineer, that’s ok for the nerds and Stay At Home Dads. A friend of mine calls herself the CEO of her house, which is cute til you realize the paycheck stinks. I know, I know, mothers should be content with the love of their families and sloppy baby kisses as sustenance. (Whatever. I love my family and the messy kisses I get from my child, but that doesn’t pay the mortgage or get us into a much needed larger home.)
What’s funny to me is people that are supposedly part of the world, AKA Working, still feel detached from life and the happenings of the world outside their cube. What a wicked world we live in; no matter where we are in it, we never, truly feel part of it. Perhaps this is why I started this blog. I want to know if my thoughts are shared by others.
What are other people doing to stay connected to their world? I have been working my whole adult life and now I am a working mother. I want to know what people feel the pros and cons of their world are. The grass is always greener, they say, but I am skeptical. I’m more in the camp of sticking with the devil I know. There are days when I feel staying at home with my kids is the right thing, but I worry about staying connected to the world and keeping them engaged. I’m pretty addicted to my paycheck as well as my retirement contributions and the thought of losing that and years of experience scares me.
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